P*tty Trai*ing is a Fucking Nightmare
The mistakes I made and the solution I found to get to the other side.
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Okay today we are taking a journey into the dark underworld of POTTY TRAINING. For every heartwarming baby giggle, and sweet coordinated mommy-and-me outfit, there is an equal and opposite toilet-related accident. And I’m finally ready to talk about it.
Potty training is not for the weak. I wouldn’t wish this process on my worst enemy. In fact, I feel that any job candidate with “completed toddler potty training” on their CV or resumé is a person I would strongly consider hiring, because that is the person who has seen some shit (literally) and has made it out alive.
I’ve been a mom for 2.5 years and this is by far the hardest leadership role I’ve ever taken on in my 39 years on this planet. It requires extraordinary patience, collectedness, determination, and a zen mindset. None of which was in my possession when I started. I’ve fumbled a bunch, but I’m happy to report I’m on the other side now, and ready to reflect on what went wrong.
My first mistake: I decided that you know what? I’m usually so Type-A and researched and prepared about everything, mmmmmmaybe I overdid it with Baby Led Weaning, and mmmmmaybe for potty training I just vibe it out and go with the flow. I snubbed the potty training book that I was given, left it on the shelf. I didn’t mentally prepare, I didn’t know what to expect. And here’s what I will say:
Potty training is not the one to vibe out on.
I repeat.
Potty training is not the one to vibe out on.
We started on January 2, 2024. The first 3 days were cute, my daughter was excited about wearing undies and putting stickers on a chart. She quickly grasped the concept of pee pee and poo poo in the toilet. But after that, the next 4 months that followed were nothing short of unhinged and hysterical for everyone involved.
I fell into all of the potty training land mines like: